The other woman

Last I left off I was in the middle of a very loving relationship with a younger man. I was the first person he wanted to see in the morning, the person he wanted to dine with. In his eyes I could do no wrong – most of the time. Then, in an instant, it all changed. A younger, cuter, tinier woman came along. And she stole my man!

The morning we introduced my 19-month-old son to his younger sister he wouldn’t even look at her. Within a day or two he couldn’t take his eyes off her. He’s still happy to see me in the mornings but because he knows I will take him to see her, the thrill of cuddling with me alone is gone. Yes, he still enjoys reading books in bed together, as long as she is there. If not, we must go find her.

It took us over nine months to come up with a name for our daughter.  Within six hours of his introduction to her he renamed her ‘B’. Funny, after 19 months he still hasn’t come up with a pet name for me.

I did anticipate there would be some jealousy and struggle for lap time while I was nursing or holding the baby. I was just naïve and thought that this struggle would be because he wanted to be with me. Turns out it’s not me he doesn’t want to share – it’s her.  If she’s on my lap that’s where he wants to be… but once she’s off my lap the appeal of sitting there himself fades away pretty swiftly. Heaven forbid another child should stop to check out his B in the playground – this invariably results in a firm shove (aka ‘get your butt away from my sister!).

He’s always there for her. If she’s upset he’ll run find her a pacifier and will plop it in her mouth. He’ll rock her car seat to sooth her and today he even offered her his prize truck. Yes, he wanted to share his prize truck with her.

Me and my guy still have alone time and I cherish those hours. I also cherish my time alone with B. The transition is going better than I could have hoped and while I’ve lost something I’ve gained a whole lot more. I just wish there was more time in the day so I could truly enjoy every moment of my new threesome!

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